Our Corrupt Attorney General

It’s Thursday. There are 635 days to the midterms. Trump’s revenge dream gets a boost, segregation is about to make a comeback and ethnic cleansing is no joke.

Be advised: This newsletter uses profanity. But only because there are assholes everywhere.

Note: Hey, Sexy Patriots! You already know shit is awful and a kajillion different kinds of fucked up these days. But things are also just weird. Like one of the things that makes us feel guilty is when the Trumpland scumbags gang up on someone we hate. We don’t want to enjoy it. We don’t want to be that petty, that small. Alas…

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! That is sooooooooo goddamn funny!!!!!! Politico has basically become Gym Jordan as a website and this is the goodwill it bought them from the evil asses they spent so much time kissing. Trump is even tweeting about them on his garbage website! And it’s total bullshit nonsense! But there’s a lesson here beyond showing everyone just how dickish and vindictive we can be — you cannot appease these shitheads, so don’t try. Stand your ground. Have some principles. Follow your mission. Don’t kiss ass.

Of all the shit we don’t get about Trumpland, it’s the countless people and institutions who let a moron gameshow host wipe his ass with their self-respect who baffle us the most. So have some dignity, America. Resist the orange idiot. And good luck, Politico. LOL. Y’all have a blessed day. More: The Independent

Note two: Hey while we’re talking about people with no self-respect, congrats to the dunces on the left who volunteered to tell the New York Times that Trump’s war on DEI is actually a good thing. Fucking idiots. More: NY Times

Note three: Um somehow Liddle Marco Rubio is now the nation’s archivist. What the hell is happening? More: ABC

Note four: We’re still trying to wrap our broken brains around the fact that a delinquent named “Big Balls” is fucking with all of our nation’s secrets and payment systems. If America is ok with this, then we probably don’t deserve to be a country. More: Wired

Note five: This isn’t that funny until you learn that Tuberville never coached Mahomes and so this whole thing is completely made up.

Note six: Trump spoke at the National Prayer Breakfast this morning where he pretended to be a Christian and said he wanted to unify the country. Then he went back to fucking over poor people and waging war against Americans. More: AP News

Note seven: We were gonna show you a video of Nutty Nancy Mace using a slur at a hearing, but she’s the fucking worse and we thought we’d just share this story about other members making fun of her. More: HuffPost

Note eight: Trump and his team of Putin punks are trying to get more of our spies killed. Remember when email security was the most important issue in the world? More: NBC

Note nine: Amber Ruffin has been named as the host of the White House Correspondents Dinner. A Black woman making fun of Trump? No way he shows up. More: TV Line

Note 10: We’re so excited for RFK Jr. to tell us we can cure this shit with pixie sticks and duct tape…

Note 11: Trump and the Real World guy he put in charge of transportation want to take over airline safety. So watch out for falling planes. More: Mediaite

Note 12: Thank you to the Senate Democrats who have been holding the floor to delay Russel Vought’s confirmation. We’re seeing that Schumer has started to call for a blockade on all nominations. This is the way. It’s also proof that your calls are working. So keep it up. More: NBC

Note 13: House Democrats tried to subpoena Elon Leon yesterday, but Ro Khanna missed the vote. He says he was busy and didn’t know about it, but other Democrats on the committee told Politico that’s a lie. Ro has been working for Elon Leon. If he wants a future in the Democratic Party, he needs to start working for the people. More: The Hill

Note 14: Get ready for war with Panama. Basically we’re just Russia now and Canada, Greenland and Panama are our Ukraines. So that sucks. More: AP News

Note 15: We hate to link to Politico, but this is fucking energy we are looking for…

Note 16: We’re basically the Soviet Union now as Trump and his cronies try to purge history. So much for all that it-can’t-happen-here bullshit. More: ProPublica

Note 17: What Trump and his scumbags did to this 4-star admiral is despicable. If only we had a real White House press corps to ask hard questions about it. More: NBC

Note 18: If you don’t know Jared Golden, he’s basically Susan Collins as a House Democrat. And even he is calling out “weirdo billionaire” Elon Leon. More: Maine Public

Note 19: So we realized something last night that we’re pretty embarrassed about. We haven’t really mentioned Black History Month. Hell, you’d think we’re the Trump administration. We like to think that we celebrate Black excellence and contributions to this nation year ‘round, but that’s no excuse for our fuck up. So as we start to remedy it, please enjoy the greatest rendition of the National Anthem of all time, courtesy of Marvin Gaye…

Note 20: And on that overdue note, let’s go do some news! We sure hope y’all are having a great week. Or at least a better week than Politico. LOL! Sorry, but not sorry. Love y’all!

Here we go

Our corrupt Attorney General got started at work yesterday, and one of the first things she did was announce an investigation into everyone who investigated Trump. So we now live in a country where it’s legal for Trump to attempt a coup and steal our national security documents, but it’s illegal to investigate those things. Human traffickers and big time criminals must love that this is what DOJ is focused on now. Oh and if you really want to be pissed off today, just look at the picture in this link of who swore Bondi in. Trump even praised Ginni Thomas even though he couldn’t remember her name!

More: PBS

It gets worse

So nothing could be worse than Pam Bondi being Trump’s personal revenge valet, right? Wrong. One of the 15 memos she fired off on her first day was a directive for DOJ to find ways to go after companies that have DEI policies. So yeah, they want to criminalize diversity efforts. Another way of putting that is Trump and his fuckheads want to bring back segregation and now they’re using the Justice Department to do just that.

More: Slate

Seems real to us

Despite 24 hours of Trump scum making excuses and trying to walk back Trump’s calls for ethnic cleansing in Gaza to make way for new resorts, Trump is sticking with it and Netanyahu is on board. Trump claimed in a social media post that no U.S. troops will be involved and it will be super easy to resettle “in far safer and more beautiful communities, with new and modern homes, in the region.” This is the same asshole who doesn’t want to rebuild L.A., right? If this sounds like the run-up to the Iraq War to you, well, you’re not alone. Scary shit, y’all.

More: CBS

Trump Golf Track

Today’s clips

A group that played a key role in Donald Trump’s voter outreach to the Arab American community alongside his allies is rebranding itself after the president said that the U.S. would “take over” the Gaza Strip. More: AP News

President Donald Trump was reportedly gifted two beepers — one regular and one golden — from Israel’s Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu when the leaders met in Washington, D.C., this week. The gifts were reportedly “a nod to” Israel’s deadly September 2024 operation in which it exploded hundreds of pagers and other devices used by members of the Iran-backed Hezbollah militant group in Lebanon and Syria, an Israeli official told The Associated Press. More: HuffPost

Leaders of the pro-Palestinian movement that rallied opposition to Joe Biden and Kamala Harris in the 2024 election are standing by their strategy amid new criticism that they weakened the Democratic ticket after President Donald Trump said he wants to “take over” the Gaza Strip. More: NBC

President Donald Trump is ready to take his fight against transgender athletes to the International Olympic Committee. More: NBC