Republicans are cowards

It’s Thursday. There are 621 days until the midterm elections. Trump takes aim at a real president, why Republicans are cowards and we might actually be in disarray.

Be advised: This newsletter uses profanity. But most of it’s directed at the asshole who calls himself a king.

Note: Hey there, Sexy Patriots! It’s so great to be with you today. As insanely fucked up as things are, we really enjoy writing this newsletter. We especially love this opening note where we endeavor to find a (sometimes) funny way to put a smile on your face before we have to tell you that everything is a piss-soaked nightmare. But today we’re not gonna do funny or clever. Today we’re just gonna open up the fire hose of f-bombs and let it flow, baby. If you’ll permit us…

(Clears throats) Nope. Absolutely not. Never in a kajillion fucking years or over our dead and still-somehow-hot bodies. We are Americans. And we will never ever ever ever ever ever have a goddamn motherfucking shit-eating king. Fuck any taint-lick dickfaced assmouth who has the goddamn nerve to think he gets to rule over our hot asses. We don’t fucking think so. Not today. Not tomorrow. Not motherfucking ever. We don’t speak orange dumbfuck, so someone translate this shit for him. Because this here is the United States of America. We were born by kicking the shit out of the last punk bitch who called himself our king, so we tend to take this kinda thing pretty fucking seriously. So fuck that plastic crown and that shit-stained throne and motherfuck the simple asshole who tries to sit in it. Thank you.

What do you think, SPs? New Declaration of Independence? Hey it was just an idea. Y’all have a blessed day.

Note two: It’s true we’ve all been overwhelmed by the shock and awe of stupid since Trump took office. But we can report that this country ain’t going down without a fight. Thank you to former NFL punter Chris Kluwe for showing us how it’s done. Let’s go!

Note three: Today Elon Leon and Trump are firing 6,000 IRS agents. So good luck getting someone on the phone over there. Thank goodness this country is finally looking out for rich asshole tax cheats. More: Independent

Note three: This one isn’t funny. It’s awful and you should brace yourself. A little girl in Texas took her own life after her schoolmates bullied her about her family’s immigration status. Evil is alive and well in this country, and we have to defeat it. RIP, little angel. More: CNN

Note four: Mike Pence and Nikki Haley are calling out Trump for selling out Ukraine. Unfortunately nobody gives a shit what those two losers think about anything. More: The Hill

Note five: Remember, SPs, we’ve got a super duper important state Supreme Court race to win in Wisconsin. More: BoltsMag

Note six: Remember when the Teamsters were tough and not led by an ass-kissing bitch weasel?

Note seven: It’s stunning how many veterans Trump and Leon are fucking over. Even Fox News dipshits are begging their orange daddy for mercy. More: Mediaite

Note eight: There was a big new Quinnipiac poll out yesterday. We’re gonna talk about some of it in the news section, but we did want to make sure y’all knew that Elon Leon is at 38 percent favorable with 50 percent unfavorable. Trump is underwater too (45/49) but America does not like the freak and we need to exploit that. More: KVUE

Note nine: Today a new Washington Post poll found that 57 percent of Americans think Trump has “exceeded his authority” since taking office. Yeah, no fucking shit. More: Washington Post

Note 10: Want to feel deeply ashamed this morning? Of course you do. America is running concentration camps in South American jungles. So yeah, we should all be pretty goddamned ashamed. More: NPR

Note 11: We actually found something we agree with Trump on. Rush this airplane, Boeing. We don’t even care if the motherfucker has wings.

Note 12: Trump’s pick to be U.S. Attorney in DC is now investigating Democratic lawmakers. To be honest, we hope his dumbass starts arresting people. Let’s get it all out in the open who and what Trump and his scum really are. More: Reuters

Note 13: The governor of Indiana is fucking with Dolly Parton. Big mistake, pal. Git his ass, Dolly! More: Daily Beast

Note 14: Gallup has Trump’s approval rating at 45 percent with 51 percent disapproving. So anyone still taking that mandate bullshit seriously is a goddamn idiot. More: Gallup

Note 15: Ok this one stung a little bit.

Note 16: According to Oliver Darcy, the AP’s Julie Pace flew down to Mar-a-Lago to try and make peace over the AP being banned from covering White House events. To her credit, Pace did not fold. Darcy reported that all the news organizations, including Newsmax and Fox, wrote a letter to the White House calling bullshit on the ban. Now we just need someone to teach Trump how to read it. More: Status

Note 17: SecDrunk Pete Hegseth is calling for the Pentagon to cut 40 percent of its budget over five years. Remember when Trump used to lie and say the Army ran out of bullets? Apparently he wants to make that true. More: CNN

Note 18: Want to be embarrassed and angry? Some Senate Democrats now say they regret voting for Trump cabinet nominations. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU THINK WAS GOING TO HAPPEN?! More: HuffPost

Note 19: For today’s Happy Ending, we give you the star of Jack Reacher calling out Matt Gaetz as a “motherfucker.” Thank you, Mr. Reacher. More: HuffPost

Note 20: And on that badass note, let’s go do some news! We sure hope y’all are having an awesome week. And remember that the only real king is LeBron. Love y’all!

The real dicktator

Donald Trump has now officially aligned himself with Putin, attacking Ukrainian President Zelensky as a “dictator” and waging an all-out PR campaign against the heroic leader. Trump continues to lie about Zelensky’s approval rating, which is significantly better than Trump’s. And this morning we’re learning that the U.S. is refusing to join a G7 statement calling Russia the aggressor and Zelensky and a Trump envoy just canceled a joint press conference. This is a real low point for our nation, and we’ve had lots of them. Fuck Trump. Long live Ukraine.

More: CNN

Wimps

In a new story from Gabe Sherman, Vanity Fair is reporting that the reason Republican lawmakers don’t stand up to Trump is because they are worried he will send his cult to kill them. We wish we were making this up. An entire branch of government has surrendered to a wannabe king because they are scared of his dumbshit supporters. It looks like Tillis even folded over Hegseth because of “credible” death threats. Someone should tell these chickenshits that this stuff only gets worse the more they give in.

More: Vanity Fair

Not great, Bob

So it’s no secret that the Democratic Party is in a bit of disarray right now. Somehow our leaders were caught flat-footed by a really obvious threat the rest of us saw coming. And we really need to get our act together. That new Q-poll we were talking about earlier shows that Trump, Leon and Republicans are unpopular. But our congressional Democrats are even worse off. Congressional Democrats have a 21 percent approval rating with 68 percent disapproval. That means our own voters don’t even like our leaders. And that ain’t good. Congressional Republicans do nothing but kiss orange ass and fuck things up and they’re sitting at 40 percent approval with 52 percent disapproval. So yeah, we need to get our asses in gear and fast. The midterms will be here before we know it.

More: Quinnipiac Poll

Trump Golf Track

TrumpGolfTrack.com

Today’s clips

New York Gov. Kathy Hochul (D) on Wednesday pushed back against President Trump after the White House rescinded approval of Manhattan’s congestion pricing plan. More: The Hill

Civilians in this hard-hit eastern city say they are feeling increasingly abandoned by the United States as President Donald Trump escalates attacks on their wartime leader Volodymyr Zelenskyy. More: NBC

President Donald Trump on Wednesday said he made a “very risky decision” in deciding to run in the 2024 presidential election, adding that he would have had “a very nasty life” had he lost that race. More: HuffPost

These were but the latest posts that GlomarResponder has made over the years that suggest the operator of the account is an ICE employee. GlomarResponder has also routinely expressed blatantly racist and anti-immigrant views. Through an extensive review of GlomarResponder’s X posts, publicly available documents, and other social media profiles and posts, the Texas Observer has identified the operator of GlomarResponder as James “Jim” Joseph Rodden, a 44-year-old who works as an assistant chief counsel for ICE in the Dallas area. Rodden represents the agency in immigration court hearings where judges decide whether an individual is removed from the country. More: Texas Observer